Your satisfaction is guaranteed.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Abandon hope, ye who enter here.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Game Freak sticks to its guns.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                So where does that leave real soccer?
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Here’s one for the box: “The meatloaf of videogames.”
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Oscar bait comes to videogames.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Things are gonna get a bit meta.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Consider the tale un-told.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                We mean this in a good way.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Schlockvival horror? Let’s go with schlockvival horror.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Michael Brough’s latest treasure is a simulacrum of modern existence. It’s also hard as shit.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                As might befit a game where you play 100 people at once.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Ground control to player one.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Lost Planet 3‘s wonderful voice acting warmly welcomes you to its vast white wasteland.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                To what is Bioshock Infinite heir?
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Spicy Horse’s dungeon-crawler forgets to make clicking things fun.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                You will be encouraged to call a man “Crazy Dave.” You will comply.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                You will tickle and be tickled.
            
     
                        
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Time travel is not involved.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Largely, you know what you’re in for here.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                The problem: the NSA is real, but Batman is not.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                The developers of Pid take things in a more primal direction.
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                Red Barrels’ debut makes you feel powerless all over again. It is “enjoyable.”
            
     
            
    
        
    
    
        
            
                It’s like William Gibson and J.R.R. Tolkien had a baby, and it was really ugly.