Naming Rights
A satirical email exchange with a fictional brand consultant who will not stop pitching names for the magazine.
Jamin Brophy-Warren (jaminbrophywarren@gmail.com) · Game magazine
Bart, pleasure to make your acquantaince. A friend of mine suggested you might be able to assist us as we’re still looking for a name for our project - a magazine for the thinking gamer. Please let me know if you would be interested. Something funny and pithy really.
Best,
Jamin
Bart Anderson IV (bart@spawn.ly) · Re: Game magazine
Jamin --
First, Bart Anderson is my great-grandfather's name. Please, call me Bart Anderson IV.
Second, thank you for inquiring about Spawn Group's Brand Consulting services. I don't know about "funny" names but we have a stellar reputation for generating AAA, blockbuster, out-of-the-box identities for our clients.
Do you know Pepsi Amp? We created the Amp Lamp, a table lamp whose base has a nozzle and a storage tank (for Pepsi Amp). Now everyone at the Brooklyn Cyclones game where we gave them out associates the kick-ass taste of Pepsi Amp with the kick-ass activity of reading at night. So yeah, I think we know a thing or two about building really sharp brands that get people talking.
Speaking of talking, let's do that about your magazine. Or should I say, let's do that about COMMODORE 65.
Duke Nukem Forever,
Bart Anderson IV
President, Spawn Group
PS - Our rate is two thousand dollars per every time you say "wow," so I'm guessing right now you owe us about four thousand dollars.
