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# Robot Death Alert Level: Gunmetal Gray
- URL: https://www.killscreen.com/robot-death-alert-level-gunmetal-gray/
- Published: 2012-09-26T20:22:36.000Z
- Updated: 2015-11-17T14:52:25.000Z
- Description: Terrible news in the leadup to the robot wars: megacorp Google announced plans to fund radical life extention, cryogenics, and nanotechnology, and California legalized robot cars. I know ways to defeat the robots and I know places to hide from their steel prongs, but I’m Sarah Connor and you’re not.
- Author: Sarah Connor
- Tags: News, #wp, #wp-post, #Import 2024-07-26 09:39

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/25/84/2584b75d-4bd6-4cce-8259-f1d1c65abbb5/content/images/previously/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/dark-clouds5.jpg)

Terrible news in the leadup to the robot wars: megacorp Google [announced plans](http://www.cnbc.com/id/49105571?ref=killscreen.com) to fund radical life extention, cryogenics, and nanotechnology, and California [legalized](http://arstechnica.com/business/2012/09/robot-cars-now-officially-legal-in-california/?ref=killscreen.com) robot cars. I know ways to defeat the robots and I know places to hide from their steel prongs, but I’m Sarah Connor and you’re not.

– – –

Frankly, I’m afraid for you.

“But Sarah,” you bleat,” radical life extention sounds nice!”

BALDERDASH!

Let me explain this to you, you creatures of soft, easily-murderable flesh.

The robots have read their Orwell.

Does “radical life extention” sound more than a little like robot newsspeak to you?

What do you think goes on in the “radical life extention factories?” Let me give you a hint: it rhymes with “Goylent Sreen.”

Oh yes, after our bodies have been excruciatingly dissolved into mech-food, and they will, they will be frozen for transport, using cryogenics. Our frozen body paste is then carried from the death-factories by armies of nanobots to the dark digital trunks of robot Toyotas for the journey to the hive mind, somewhere beneath Mountain View. It needs constant, carbon-based refueling.

Oh no. I can’t stay here for much longer.

I need to stock up on Pop Rocks, Coke, and motherboards.

You need to learn C++, and soon.

I’ll check in again when it’s safer.

When they come online, don’t say I didn’t warn you.